Beatrix, Anyone?
by Famine
Summary: Beatrix finds herself in a pickle when her concieted-ness drives her wild. What will happen? FIND OUT!


"I'm Too Good For You!"  
  
It was a lovely day in the world of Gaia. Alexandria never looked so beautiful. Summer-time was rolling along, and everyone was getting along happily with each other. That is, until Beatrix decided Garnet wasn't good enough for her to protect. "How can you say that, Bee Bee?" Steiner asked, sipping down his hot chocolate. "We've been protecting Garnet since she was just a baby. We can't just leave her." "We? Who said anything about we?" Beatrix asked, coldly. "I'm going solo, Steiner. Quite frankly, you're bringing down my reputation. Not to mention the girls around here have been saying how ugly you are. I'm sorry, Steiner, but I can't be seen with your square face any longer. I'm outta here!" Beatrix packed up her bags and began to leave. "B-Bee Bee..." Steiner sniffled.  
Beatrix walked around Alexandria, looking for someone to use and abuse as she did Steiner. It was night time, so all the real lonely guys were probably outside. She saw Ruby's Bar. Walking in, she noticed a really good-looking man sitting by the booth. She walked over to him, bouncing her buttocks as she walked. "Hi, there." She giggled out. "Umm...aren't you Alexandria's Knight?" The man asked. "Why, yes I am." She smiled. "You're too good for me." He walked out of the bar. Beatrix wondered why he didn't want her as every other man wants her. She looked around the bar and noticed everyone was gone. They were all probably too scared to be around her, as she killed tons of people for Queen Brahne. She walked out of the bar, miserable and tired.  
"Maybe I shouldn't have left Steiner." She realized. But she shook her head. "Steiner bites! I need a real man." She peeked into a window. The very good-looking man from before was inside, bringing food inside. Two little kids jumped up, tugging at the man's pants. "Yay! Food!" The little girl said, happily. Beatrix finally realized that they were poor. She hated poor people with all her might, as she thought they were useless and just a waste of air. The man looked over and saw Beatrix looking in. She turned to look like she wasn't paying attention. He frowned and got up. She saw the door open. "Hey...why are you out here in the cold?" He asked. "Well..I kind of left the castle. They aren't good enough for me...and you aren't either so stop talking to me! You...you hobo!" She screamed. The man frowned again and closed the door. Beatrix looked back in the window. It was a shabby-looking house, anyway. Why would she want to stay in there?  
She woke up. Looking around, she noticed she must've collapsed during the night. She was inside a small shack--the same shack she remembered the good looking man was in! There was no one in sight. The little boy ran in. "Hi, Miss." She looked at him. "Hi...street rat..." She mumbled. "Daddy says you're the Queen's Knight." Beatrix nodded. The little boy ran away. Suddenly, the man appeared. "Freddie told me you were awake. I didn't know if he was lieing like always." The man said. "I'm Seifer. Mind telling me what you were doing sleeping on the cold ground?" He asked. His baby blue eyes were very attractive to Beatrix. She thought he might actually be worthy--but that ended as soon as she remembered he was a bum. "I just--it's none of your business." She shouted. "Well, I hope you can get up and leave because we have no desire to keep you here." Seifer said, tugging on the two children. "Are they your kids?" "In a way. They're my siblings, since our parent's died a while back. It's okay, though, since we get along fine without them. I'm kind of their father, ya know?" He smiled. "But you should leave. I don't think it's safe for you to hide out here while Steiner put out a ransom on your head."  
"A ransom?" Beatrix asked. "Yes. He ordered every bounty hunter in the world against you. 5 Billion Gil to anyone who brings you back alive or dead." Beatrix's eyes widdened. "You should really leave. You're endangering me and my family." Beatrix nodded and got out. She used her super silent fox techniques to make her way past the border of Alexandria. But now--she's stuck at a waterfall. She looked back to see seventeen bounty hunters comming at her. She took out her sword. "Wanna play?" She laughed. One of the bounty hunters charged at her immediatly. She stabbed him and through him off the cliff. The rest of the hunters charged. There was a woman at the end--Lani. She smacked her axe with her hands. "I'll play." She giggled. Beatrix finished off most of the bounty hunters until only two were left. "I'm not risking my life!" The cowardly man said. He ran off. "Loser!" The other woman shouted. She charged at Beatrix, but Beatrix got on the ground and swiftly kicked the woman off the cliff. Lani walked up. "You're gonna be next!"  
"Hahaha. Looks like I get the five billion gil. You get to go away with...a body bag!" She held up her axe. Beatrix looked behind her to see another troop of bounty hunters headded straight for her. Beatrix looked up and Lani, getting ready to strike. She grabbed the dagger that was in her boot and stabbed it into Lani's gut. Lani gasped for air and collapsed. Beatrix saw that the crew was still comming, this time lead by Hippaul. "There's no where to hide, Beatrix. Come with me and nobody will get hurt." He promised. Beatrix was surrounded. She knew what she had to do, so she lept into the waterfall. It was either take the chance to survive--or go back to Alexandria and die. She hit the water with a thump.  
She opened her eyes. She didn't know where she was, but that she was safe. She noticed that she was close to Lindblum. That's it! She could go to Lindblum and get Regent Cid's help. There was no way to get there other than South Gate, so she wandered along. A strange creature suddenly appeared. "Gimme all yer money!" The creature said. Beatrix noticed. "A Gimme Cat? How strange. I've only heard tales of something like you." "That's nice, lady, now gimme all yer money!" The Gimme Cat charged at Beatrix. He giggled as he took Beatrix's money--the only money she had left. She tried to grab the gimme cat, but he was too fast for her. "Come back here you little brat!" She screamed, chasing him all around the forest. It was no use. The Gimme Cat was gone and so was Beatrix's money. She remembered that it was free to get on the South Gate Train.  
About an hour of travelling, Beatrix finally made it to South Gate. She just wanted to sit down in that train and go get help. She sat down, resting her head back. She noticed there was only two other people on the train--and she recognized both of them. Part-Time Worker Mary was the girl Steiner told her about. He couldn't stop bragging about how he saved the girl's life from depression. The other girl was Lilian. She was the waitress from Lindblum so she probably travelled back and forth a lot. "Hi, Lilian." Beatrix said, waving. "Hi." Lilian said in a sexy voice. Beatrix looked at Mary and decided not to talk to her since she wasn't worthy of her presence.  
Beatrix looked out the window. She was dreaming away, but suddenly saw Hippaul and two Bounty Hunters come up to ask the conductor something. They started walking this way. The Conductor came in first. "Is this the woman you're looking for?" He asked. Part-Time Worker Mary got up to pick up the muffin she dropped. "Yes! Get her!" Hippaul shouted, taking out a pistol. Beatrix jumped up. "Move it, Chub!" She screamed to Mary, shoving her away. "Ch-Chub?" Mary started shaking. Beatrix ran for the back door, Hippaul shooting at her and missing. She jumped out but noticed one of the bounty hunters stood there. "You're mine, pretty-girl!" He shouted, holding a stun gun up. She kneed him in the pelvic area. "Oh boy. There goes those kids Betty wanted!" He screamed in a high-pitched voice. She shoved him away and ran as far as she could, until getting shot by an arrow by the female bounty hunter. "Very good, Shenequa." Hippaul said, kicking Beatrix's body down.  
Beatrix woke up. She was in Alexandria Jail Cell. "Hey, sleeping beauty." Blank said in a sexy voice. "Blank! You gotta get me out of here." Beatrix begged. Blank shook his head. "You're staying until your execution." He walked away. Beatrix's eyes widened as she realized that she was going to have the public death penalty. For what? Telling Steiner that he's not good enough for her? She slumped into the bed.  
About two hours later, Blank returned. "Time for your exit cue." He winked. "You're setting me free?" Beatrix asked. "No. You gotta die. You know? Exiting from your body." He laughed. They walked up into the gullotine. All of Alexandria was watching. Beatrix saw Shenequa, the woman who shot her with the arrow. Shenequa giggled. "Y-Y-You monster! I'm going to kill you!" Beatrix screamed. "Uh huh. Sure. Let's just cut her head off already." She laughed. Garnet and Zidane walked up. "The public execution of my ex-knight, Beatrix, will begin now!" She spoke with grace. "Have any last requests?" The Executioner asked. Beatrix spit on his face. He laughed and lowered the lever. The sharp knife-like object comming down. Suddenly, a miracle happened. The blade was stopped by a higher force. Beatrix looked up, noticing that it was gone, and she jumped out of the wooden prison. She grabbed Zidane's daggers, slitting his throat. Everyone gasped. She moved over to Garnet, slitting her throat. She continued until every Alexandrian--except Seifer, as he didn't show up--was dead. Shenequa stood, laughing.  
"You're gonna wish you stuck with the decapitation when I get through with you." Shenequa winked at her. "She didn't have a choice." Part-Time Worker Mary said, walking up from the rubble. "It was me who saved her, not herself. Me and....my friend." She laughed. "Friend?" Beatrix asked. "You should watch out what you call people, Beatrix, as some take it personally." Her eyes glared up. Suddenly, the earth shook and cracked, and a big snake woman--Lamia--appeared. "I heard you were being mean to my Mary." Lamia slithered up to the two women. "Lamia, my goddess, destroy EVERYTHING! I want this place to be nothing but dust when you're finished with it!" Mary laughed. Shenequa began to run. Lamia appeared before her, swallowing her whole. Beatrix looked over. "I'm really sorry, Mary. I never meant to call you something like that." "Well--it hurt! Now you're gonna hurt!" Lamia slithered up to Beatrix. "How do you wanna die?" Lamia asked. "Not so fast!" Steiner shouted from atop a roof. "Steiner! You came to save me!" Beatrix sighed with relief. "Not really. I only wanna watch!" He laughed. "I'm too 'good' for you." Lamia looked over to Beatrix with carnal eyes.  
6 months later, Steiner was happily living with Lilian. Part-Time Worker Mary stayed as shop-saleswoman in South Gate, and Beatrix...well I guess you know what happened to her ^_~  
  
THE END 


End file.
